• Mon Aug 03 22:05:29 SAST 2015
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Third Umpire

Energy Minister Tina Joemat-Pettersson, for allowing the nuclear procurement process to proceed in the absence of public debate or input from stakeholders, and without clarity on costs or how the deal will be financed.

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1%
99%

Ses’khona leader and newly elected Western Cape ANC official Andile Lili, whose statement that criminals should be “killed immediately and brutally” rather than left to the police is unacceptable in a democracy.

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11%
89%

Telecommunications and Postal Services Minister Siyabonga Cwele, who has been so conspicuous by his absence despite the problems experienced by the SA Post Office that he may as well be a spy in deep cover.

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4%
96%

PetroSA chairman Nonhlanhla Jiyane. Leaked legal opinion indicates that the board’s bid to fire executives who were suspended following reports of a R15bn loss will fail due to the weakness of the case against them.

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1%
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Baron John Sewel, deputy speaker of the UK House of Lords, who faces the prospect of being the first peer to be expelled on the basis of a rule he introduced, after being filmed snorting cocaine off a prostitute’s breast.

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37%
63%

Eastern Province rugby boss Cheeky Watson. We understand that the Kings are cash-strapped, but failing to pay salaries is unforgivable, and making promises when you don’t know they can be kept is, well, Cheeky.

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4%
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Trade and Industry Minister Rob Davies. If he thinks a new clause in the investment bill providing that the government “may consent” to international arbitration is going to reassure foreign investors, he is living in dreamland.

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4%
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Gauteng ANC chairman Paul Mashatile. His suggestion that workers should have more power to decide where their pension funds are invested is a welcome alternative to the party’s call for prescribed asset allocations.

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84%
16%

Ipid acting executive director Israel Kgamanyane, for rushing to act against whistleblowers who leaked information on nepotism and maladministration in the organisation, rather than tackling the issues at hand.

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Senegalese President Macky Sall, for co-operating with the African Union to set up the special court that is sitting in his country and is about to try former Chadian dictator Hissene Habre for crimes against humanity.

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88%
12%

Three-time world surfing champion Mick Fanning, who came within an inch of being the first man to be eaten by a shark on live television during the final of the JBay Open surfing competition in Jeffreys Bay in the Eastern Cape, but got away with only a tale left to tell.

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93%
7%

Harmony CEO Graham Briggs. It’s sad that sensible compromises seem possible only when mines are about to close, but the agreement he has struck with unions at Doornkop should save both the mine and most jobs.

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95%
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Cosatu president Sdumo Dlamini, for putting congress delegates’ credentials to a vote by a show of hands rather than secret ballot, a break from past practice clearly intended to intimidate wavering shop stewards.

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11%
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Health Minister Aaron Motsoaledi. We should expect nothing less, but it remains a feather in SA’s cap that we are the only African state that has met the World Health Organisation’s requirements to prevent Ebola’s spread.

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82%
18%

Home Affairs Minister Malusi Gigaba, whose claim that onerous visa regulations are justified because sub-Saharan Africa has the most incidents of child trafficking in the world, has been shown to have no statistical basis.

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2%
98%

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Council for Medical Schemes benefits management head Paresh Prema. The regulator’s proposal that schemes be allowed to offer products that do not cover prescribed minimum benefits will help take pressure off the state.

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84%
16%

Former Prasa chief engineer Daniel Mtimkulu. The rail agency is demanding that he refund money earned during the years he held the position, after it emerged that he falsely claimed to hold a doctorate in engineering.

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12%
88%

Barack Obama, the first US president to address the African Union, for making the effort to focus on US-Africa relations as his second term draws to an end. May it be as fruitful as his Cuban and Iranian interventions.

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82%
18%

Former spokesman for the presidency Mac Maharaj, whose claim that he advised President Jacob Zuma to pay back some of the Nkandla money makes him come across as the proverbial rat abandoning a sinking ship.

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16%
84%

Nkandla ad hoc committee chairman Cedric Frolick. Stating that taxpayers have not got value for money must be the understatement of the year. Now how about doing your job and holding the executive to account?

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Alleged pyramid scheme mastermind Colin Davids, who has had assets totalling R138m frozen after a court application by the Asset Forfeiture Unit, which is investigating investor complaints against Platinum Forex.

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3%
97%

Police Minister Nathi Nhleko. Yet another ANC official whose reputation will forever be tainted by an urge to defend the indefensible, better known as the abuse of state funds to upgrade the president’s Nkandla homestead.

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Fifa president Sepp Blatter, whose formation of a task force, ostensibly to reform world football and rid it of corruption, has been panned as too little, too late and an attempt to retain control after he has stepped down.

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7%
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Health Minister Aaron Motsoaledi, for opening a criminal case against doctors who performed a Caesarian in the emergency ward of a public hospital, rather than waiting for the outcome of an internal probe.

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4%
96%

South African Civil Aviation Authority testing standards officer Nicole Swart, who has become the first licensed drone pilot in Africa, a technology that has potential for nonmilitary use in inaccessible parts of the continent.

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98%
2%

Former IEC chairwoman Brigalia Bam, who suggested SA consider a mixed electoral system to improve account-ability. Trouble is, the ANC is not listening, not even to people with her political background and integrity.

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88%
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Former prosecutions head Menzi Simelane, whose bid to avoid being struck from the advocates roll for issuing unlawful instructions to his predecessor when he was director-general of justice is not going at all well.

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3%
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Passenger Rail Agency of SA CEO Lucky Montana. It has emerged that inadequate foreign currency hedging may have caused the cost of a locomotive procurement contract to swell to almost R5bn from R3.5bn.

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Ipid’s Gauteng head, Felicia Ntshangase, who has been suspended after allegedly failing to recuse herself from an interview panel that recommended her — apparently underqualified — son for a senior post in the agency.

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The Third Umpire

Public Works Minister Thulas Nxesi, who has outdone himself in avoiding political accountability for the Nkandla scandal by blaming “neoliberal” outsourcing to private companies and “downsizing of the public service”.

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Parliamentary standing committee on appropriations chairman Paul Mashatile, for demanding the Treasury put as much pressure on government departments to pay their municipal bills as on councils to pay Eskom.

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Communications Minister Faith Muthambi, whose insistence that she was entitled to remove SABC board members has been discredited by the disclosure that her legal adviser was struck off the roll in 2007.

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