How to disagree with your manager
by Harvard Business Review,
2016-03-22 11:29:36.0
WHAT do you say when you disagree with a manager? Here are nine tips for approaching someone who has more power than you:
1. Be realistic about the risks: First consider "the risks of not speaking up," says Joseph Grenny, the co-author of Crucial Conversations. Then weigh those against the potential consequences of taking action.
2. Decide whether to wait: "If you think other people are going to disagree too, you might want to gather your army first," says Holly Weeks, the author of Failure to Communicate. Always wait to discuss the issue in private.
3. Identify a shared goal: You’re more likely to be heard if you can connect your disagreement to a "higher purpose", according to Grenny. State the link overtly, contextualising your statements so that you’re seen not as disagreeable, but as a colleague who’s trying to advance a shared goal.
4. Ask permission to disagree. This is a smart way to give the powerful person "psychological safety" and control, Grenny says. It gives the person a choice. And, assuming he says yes, it will make you more confident about voicing your disagreement.
5. Stay calm: Do whatever you can to remain neutral. When your body language communicates reluctance or anxiety, it undercuts the message, Weeks says. Deep breaths and speaking more slowly and deliberately can help.
6. Validate the original point: Articulate the other person’s point of view. What is the idea, opinion or proposal that you disagree with?
7. Don’t judge: Grenny says to avoid words such as "shortsighted" or "hasty" that might set off your counterpart. One of his tips is to cut out all adjectives. You should also stick to the facts.
8. Stay humble: Emphasise that you’re offering your opinion, Grenny says. "It may be a well-informed, well-researched opinion, but it’s still an opinion, (so) talk tentatively and slightly understate your confidence." You should also "demonstrate equal curiosity about other views," he says.
9. Acknowledge her authority. The person in power is probably going to make the final decision, so acknowledge that. This will not only show that you know your place but also remind your superior that she has choices, Grenny says.
(Adapted from "How to Disagree with Someone More Powerful than You" at HBR.org )
Harvard Business School Publishing Corp
Picture: iSTOCK
WHAT do you say when you disagree with a manager? Here are nine tips for approaching someone who has more power than you:
1. Be realistic about the risks: First consider "the risks of not speaking up," says Joseph Grenny, the co-author of Crucial Conversations. Then weigh those against the potential consequences of taking action.
2. Decide whether to wait: "If you think other people are going to disagree too, you might want to gather your army first," says Holly Weeks, the author of Failure to Communicate. Always wait to discuss the issue in private.
3. Identify a shared goal: You’re more likely to be heard if you can connect your disagreement to a "higher purpose", according to Grenny. State the link overtly, contextualising your statements so that you’re seen not as disagreeable, but as a colleague who’s trying to advance a shared goal.
4. Ask permission to disagree. This is a smart way to give the powerful person "psychological safety" and control, Grenny says. It gives the person a choice. And, assuming he says yes, it will make you more confident about voicing your disagreement.
5. Stay calm: Do whatever you can to remain neutral. When your body language communicates reluctance or anxiety, it undercuts the message, Weeks says. Deep breaths and speaking more slowly and deliberately can help.
6. Validate the original point: Articulate the other person’s point of view. What is the idea, opinion or proposal that you disagree with?
7. Don’t judge: Grenny says to avoid words such as "shortsighted" or "hasty" that might set off your counterpart. One of his tips is to cut out all adjectives. You should also stick to the facts.
8. Stay humble: Emphasise that you’re offering your opinion, Grenny says. "It may be a well-informed, well-researched opinion, but it’s still an opinion, (so) talk tentatively and slightly understate your confidence." You should also "demonstrate equal curiosity about other views," he says.
9. Acknowledge her authority. The person in power is probably going to make the final decision, so acknowledge that. This will not only show that you know your place but also remind your superior that she has choices, Grenny says.
(Adapted from "How to Disagree with Someone More Powerful than You" at HBR.org )
Harvard Business School Publishing Corp
Change: -0.80%
Change: -1.03%
Change: -0.24%
Change: -1.13%
Change: -1.10%
Data supplied by Profile Data
Change: 0.13%
Change: 0.07%
Change: -0.80%
Change: 0.00%
Change: 0.20%
Data supplied by Profile Data
Change: 0.07%
Change: -1.06%
Change: -0.14%
Change: -0.07%
Change: 0.58%
Data supplied by Profile Data
Change: 0.37%
Change: 1.33%
Change: 0.00%
Change: 0.67%
Change: 0.65%
Data supplied by Profile Data